How would I go about telling my mother that the family may be part of the cause of my blood pressure issues?

Just yesterday I went to the doctor because I have bad migranes and a very irregular period. My blood test results already say I don't have diabetes or anemia, but I think I may be borderline for high blood pressure because at the hospital they said it was 123/78 but today it was 118/78. I usually get instant migranes when I get fustrated and I'm always fustrated with my family. My mom has little patience with me (or anyone), never really says encouraging things, I often get left out, she always fusses at me and says hurtful things. My little 9yr old brother is spoiled, rude, selfish and he doesn't give me any respect (and they know this, and it's hard b/c I always have to babysit him). My step-dad is forget ful and he really says things that hurt a lot. Since I always have to babysit my lil bro since my mom works late, I can never stay after school for tutoring or to hang with my friends. I have no life and I'm always at home doing nothing. Because of this, I get easily fustrated.

How would I go about telling my mother that the family may be part of the cause of my blood pressure issues?
I'm sorry you're dealing with such feelings of frustration. With all due respect, the answer to your issues lies within you, not in trying to make your mother, stepfather, or little brother conform to your expectations. Unfortunately, you have zero control over their behavior, only your own.





Here is what I would suggest. Rather than telling your mother that the family is giving you high blood pressure, ask her reasonably if you can have one afternoon a week off to be with your friends or go to tutoring at school. Tell her that you understand how much she relies on you to babysit for your brother, but also tell her that it's important for you to have some time for yourself. Say this calmly and politely, without making an accusations or saying anything that will make your mother get defensive.





I don't know if you get any exercise, but if you don't try to get some every day. That will help with the frustration, irregular cycle, and migraines. Tell your little brother that you are going to take a walk with him every day after school and then do it.





Your said your mother doesn't say encouraging things, which I know must hurt your feelings. But how about if you say something nice to her every day? Try that. It can be anything from asking her how her day at work went, offering to help with chores, or saying that her outfit is nice, or thanking her for something she did for you, a meal, anything. You may find that this helps you, too.





Good luck, and God bless.
Reply:Using "easily frustrated" is on a level with using "bad tempered" to excuse yourself. It's normal to be occassionally frustrated, but if you are "always fustrated with my family" then the problem is YOU. Yes, it is unfortunate that you have more family responsibilities than some of your peers, but that's just the way it is and allowing yourself to resent it will only bring on migraines. Relax and wait it out; in a few years you'll be an adult with a lot more options.





And for goodness' sake, stop frittering away your time "at home doing nothing." Persue your studies or write letters to lonely soldiers overseas or join an on-line club or learn to juggle or something. No wonder you're unhappy if you spend so much time thinking about yourself. Think about doing nice things for others instead and you will be happier.





123/78 is NOT high blood pressure; stop being such a drama queen.
Reply:talk to your mom about what the doctor SAID if you have so many problems .do you have relatives that are close to you and can let you move in try resolving this now before it gets even worse.
Reply:Tell her what the doctor says about your blood pressure and tell your mom the truth. Try to open up with her like you did just now and ask her to do the same.

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