i am so near to committing suicide, i will do it. I am a 16 yr old who has been home tutored since 13 as i was badly bullied, developed ocd, had nervous breakdown, stopped seeing my friends, quit all hobbies, social events and was eventually prescribed fluoxetene by my doctor. My mum was diagnosed with B C and it was advanced and was told within days it had spread onto her liver. She had had it for a year as she felt a lump yet refused to get checked out as "she didn't care if she died after her labrador was run over in 2004. (was told 2 yrs on)She also claimed she loved him more than the kids, which upset me regrettably. So trivial. She says she is going to die and it is all my fault (didn't help my ocd).
I have not been out for years, miss my friends and am so depressed and my parents go out all day and leave me secretly crying. They do not understand ocd. They say i can snap out of it. They do not believe it's an illness, despite 7 yrs of it.. from a girl who used to be normal
Any advice? Obsessive compulsive 16 yr old near suicide?
Kara, I too have had a Hellish life and still do. I also was severely depressed and sometimes still am. I also lost all my friends when I was very young and when I went to a "center" instead of a high school I only made two friends, and neither was very good, although one of them was somewhat decent. I also lost them in a few years. I've probably suffered pain more intense than most people on Earth ever will, except those who have been tortured severely and while in prisons for years and who were forced to watch and hear those they loved tortured and murdered in front of them.
But I still have suffered severely, including from intense physical pain that almost drove me to stabbing myself in the stomach to make it stop. I hope you read this:
It's a common thing to turn to excessive or destructive behavior, such as over-eating, in order to distract ourselves from painful memories and despair.
These are the typical reasons for a person becoming depressed and turning to suicide:
1. Not getting your way. For example: A non-Christian being prevented by a Christian from getting something they want because that Christian is obeying God. For example say your friend has just become a Christian and you haven't and still hate God (whether you believe you do or not), and you want him to spend his excess money and watch some time-wasting movie with you but he won't because he's decided to spend his excess on spreading the gospel: You will become depressed at either the wrong idea that he hates you or angry that he is hating the things you love. Basically it's anger at God that leads to depression.
2. When a Christian sees others breaking God's laws, especially when they break the more important ones deliberately, and often. Scripture gives us some insight into one ancient Christian's emotional life, whose name was Lot:
"he rescued Lot, a righteous man, who was distressed by the filthy lives of lawless men (for that righteous man, living among them day after day, was tormented in his righteous soul by the lawless deeds he saw and heard)" - 2 Peter 2:7-8
3. Others mistreating / being unloving to us.
4. False thinking such as thinking we can't do much to help anyone else in life or, after God has forgiven you, wrongly thinking that he hates you, and losing faith in his love for you.
5. Worshiping things other than God:
"The sorrows of those will increase who run after other gods." - Psalm 16:4
You may not be worshiping "gods" however, if you are not worshiping God, or worshiping other men, metaphorically or literally, more than and especially, in hatred against him, then you will become more and more filled with sorrow.
If you have not yet asked God to forgive you with sincere sorrow towards him for breaking his laws with the desire to stop breaking them, then according to Scripture you will not live forever with God nor will your mind become perfectly logical, but will remain in a tormented and chaotic state. To solve this problem you must not trust in any opinion over God's facts. For example if he said, "Do not lie" but in your opinion it's good to lie now and then, don't trust your opinion. Yes, it is good to lie in some cases for quick profit, but God will punish you for it, and if you are not forgiven yet, and you end up dying before you are forgiven, you will be punished forever for it.
He who trusts in himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe. - Proverbs 28:26
You should also not listen to those who are not forgiven for spiritual / moral wisdom:
"He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm." - Proverbs 13:20
That is common sense advice as well. For example say you want help understanding a hard math problem, are you going to get the advice of a hateful impatient idiot who doesn't understand math?
If a person truly wants to know and understand the God of the Bible in order to please rather than find fault with him, God will allow it and will let you know how to secure your future forever.
In order to get eternal life and an ever-increasingly logical mind you must also humble yourself rather than arrogant and stubborn towards God:
"whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted." - Matthew 23:12
So, willingly, without hatred, do what God asks you to.
Another problem may be your diet and comfort level. For example if you have high arches, the pain from walking around and not having good arch support may be causing you to be easily irritated. Or your sleep may be hindered by light coming in from under a door, a clock, a humming sound coming from a computer or clock, irritating bed sheets, or an uncomfortable pillow or bed.
6. If you are not getting enough saturated fat you may have poor health and feel miserable, and so again, will be easily angered. It's a myth that saturated fat is bad for you. Although something with saturated fat in it my spoil more quickly, it is still healthy to eat it when it is fresh. All those "skim" products are inferior foods to those with the saturated fat in them. A quick fix is to start eating hamburgers, whole milk (goat milk is the best known), whole yogurt, coconut milk, steak with the fat on, and salmon.
I don't know if worrying directly leads to being depressed, but it clearly can, since all sins eventually lead to extreme sadness. Worrying is when you don't trust God and then start being afraid of bad things happening to you.
About worrying Jesus said: "don't worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ho of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." - Matthew 6:25-34
Read more of what God has to say at http://romans916.com/answers.rtf/ and
http://romans916.com/thegospel.html/
Reply:Wow...I feel really sad for you. Things should not be this way.
First of all, please, please, please don't hurt yourself. I almost killed myself and now I'm so glad I'm alive. There are other people who have felt like you do. And even though we don't understand every part of your life, we do understand the pain that goes with it. With the right treatment, you CAN get better. I just wish your parents would allow you to get the right treatment.
Right now, I want you to call 1-800-SUICIDE. They know a lot more about these things than I do. It's safe and confidential and they can talk to you about your specific situation. Whatever you do, please don't hurt yourself. It's really, really not worth it.
Reply:Sorry you are feeling this way....Talk to your doctor and tell him what you have said here. Good luck to you, dear. Don't give up...Life can be beautiful!
Reply:sit down for a half hour or so. read a book or watch a funny show on tv. allow yourself some time to chill out before making any crazy decisions.
it also sounds like you need someone to talk to n get some stuff off your chest. maybe you can talk with a friend or go on a depression forum website.
Reply:Go talk to a doctor and stop complaining and or reaching out for attention online. 1800suicide, they will give you the attention you crave
Reply:You need to dail 1-800-SUICIDE. There is help out there.
Reply:oh my, I hate fluoxetene drugs. And it's sounds like you are severely depressed. MSG in your food can cause depression. Try eliminating MSG from your foods. If you don't know what MSG is, then just try eating a vegetarian diet. See if that makes you feel better.
Reply:You should NOT be taking antidepressants at your age: they cause suicidal tendencies in the young much more than in those of more mature years, so I would taper off its use, with medical advice (tell your doctor about the suicidal thoughts), and use the treatments at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on page 2: depression, and see OCD, on page 7, and loneliness, on page 9, and suicidal thoughts, on page 5. Join one of the many support groups shown. It is important to have interests, so consider taking up your hobbies again, or volunteering, even from home (read page 2), and use your energies in a positive way, to help people, which would lessen the time involved in OCD. Get a Labrador puppy for your mother, preferably the same color.
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